I Don't Deserve Your Love (But You Give It To Me Anyway)
by Aimz1904
Summary: Picking up where 4.08 left off, how I think the writers should handle the situation. Nice and fluffly at moments but also the angsty Olicity we all know and love.
1. Chapter 1

Oliver walked into the dark apartment after a long day of work. He had been working tirelessly trying to get his campaign running and the fear of failure was constant. Tonight however it was a different fear hanging over his head.  
It had been a week since he found out about his son William and a week since he had lied to the love of his life about it all. Tonight however was the end of the lies, it was time he eliminated the part of his mind that was still stranded on an island and accepted that he had to trust! With this new mindset he took himself to the kitchen and began preparing dinner.

Felicity walked into a dimly lit living room an hour later, candles laid out on the table and the strong smell of a beautiful meal made her smile, overwhelmed by the love she had for this man.

"Hey honey" Oliver began seeing her enter the room "Sit down" he continued pouring her a glass of wine and gesturing to a place at the table

"What's all of this for?" Felicity asked accepting his offer

"Nothing special just wanted to have a chat" he replied

"That's never good" she said hesitantly her fear evident

"Just sit down honey" Oliver said pulling out her chair so she could do so.

"OK so you know how I was acting a bit off in Central City, and you kept trying to get it out of me?" Oliver asked with the fear building in the pit of his stomach

"Yes, And as usual you where a stubborn ass" Felicity said laughing loudly to mask the fear of what was coming next. They were very few times Oliver was this vulnerable and when it did happen it never seemed to end well.

"Yes when I was being... that" Oliver continued with a roll of his eyes "so they was something bothering me, something I couldn't tell you, I'm still not allowed to so I need no disclosure here. I trust you more than anyone in my life, and for that reason and so many others you need to know that I have a son"

The pause that followed was the longest pause he had ever experienced. He felt immense fear in his stomach, his could feel his face getting red and hot, and he allowed himself to think of every single thing she could possibly say in reply. This continued for what felt like an eternity until the silence was broken...

"A son" Felicity began, "How Old?" She asked through gritted teeth, the pain evident in her expression

"9, oh my god he's nine, I didn't cheat on you felicity" Oliver replied with a sigh Felicity exhaled sharply at his words

"Ok so why wouldn't you tell me this sooner, what were you worried about?" She continued sounding much calmer now

At the sound of calm in her voice Oliver allowed himself to relax a bit more and explain the situation "His mother, a woman I slept with long ago, told me that if I wanted to know him I had to pretend I was just a friend and not tell anyone at all, including you... If I didn't listen I wouldn't be able to have any kind of relationship with him. But I couldn't do it, it's been a week and it's killed me keeping this from you. I have felt like my old self, the me that returned from the island and that is not the me I am when I'm with you" Oliver explained through tears welling in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks.

"Oh my love" felicity began standing up from her seat at the table and walking to her boyfriends side "you can be forgiven for wanting a relationship with your son, sure I wish you had have told me sooner and sure I wish I was the only person to have your children and yes I wish I hadn't have said that, but one thing I don't wish for is for you to hurt the way you are right now. I love you more than life itself and I will love your son just as much just because he is a piece of you" she finished wrapping her arms around Oliver

"You are the most remarkable person on the planet you know that?" Oliver replied wrapping his arms around her in reply

"Yeah I know" she laughed pulling away "but if you ever lie to me again I will pour this candle wax on your head Queen" she continued pointing to a candle on the table

"Not if I do this first" he said wrapping his arms her at the top of her thighs, picking her up and carrying her into their bedroom.

Laying her down on the bed and removing his shirt, he took a second to look at her and thought for the millionth time since he had entered her office how incredibly lucky he was. With this thought he bent over and whispered in her ear

"I'm so sorry Felicity, I love you"

"You're just lucky I love you so much and that I can keep a secret, you should know that better than anyone and you should also know that I will keep this one just as I have the rest" she replied with a soft but passionate kiss in his lips


	2. Chapter 2

Felicity Smoak and Oliver Queen lay in bed the next morning; still asleep, their bodies intertwined and clothes still on the floor from the activities of the night before. A loud knock on the door pulled them out of their slumber.

"Mmm, your mom Felicity" Oliver muttered trying to wake himself up

"Oh my gosh, we really slept in the kitchens still a mess" Felicity yelled jumping out of bed and rushing to put her clothes on

"Honey just put a bra on and answer the door" Oliver replied laughing at how nervous and jumpy she got when her mother was around

Felicity stopped for a moment, shocked by the words... "That has to be the first time I've ever heard that" she laughed while quickly continuing to get dressed

"Believe me I'm not happy about it either" he said with a groan before rolling out of bed and searching for his own clothes.

With a deep breath a slight sense of apprehension that she always managed to feel just before she saw her mother, Felicity opened the large door to see Donna Smoak standing in the archway with her bag and arms wide open.

"Mom, it's so good to see you" Felicity said hugging her mother as she entered the door

"My beautiful girl" Donna screamed, squeezing her daughter tightly

"Donna lovely to see you" Oliver said groggily stumbling out of the room shirt still in his hand

"Really honey I have to put a bra on at high speed and you can't even put a shirt on?" Felicity said rolling her eyes

"Speaking of never before spoken statements" Oliver said with a laugh slowly putting his shirt on

"Oh Hun it is perfectly fine" Donna said with a slight smile and giggle

"Let me get you some breakfast Donna" Oliver said smiling at his future mother in law

"Oh that sounds lovely" she replied happily with a nod to her daughter, a slight reference to previous conversations they had had about the man Felicity loved so much

"Do you need any help?" Felicity asked

"From you, in the kitchen... Maybe not Hun" Oliver said with a cheeky smile that he reserved for her

As he walked away from the pair Oliver thought about his plan for the Christmas party that night; images of rings, limos and his beautiful girlfriend flashed through his mind. The only shred of hope and light left in his world of darkness. Tonight he would secure their future together and ensure her safety by bringing her closer than ever. Nervousness threatening to overtake happiness he took a deep breath, looked across the room to his future Fiancé and down to the ring he now held in his hand and with that look he knew, this was his future and it was the better than he could have ever imagined.


	3. Chapter 3

Oliver stood in the door way of the small bathroom he shared with Felicity watching her try a million different hairstyles and jewelry combinations. His head buzzing with excitement and fear but still stunned by her beauty.

"Hun, I told you it will look amazing no matter how you do it. We really should go soon though" Oliver said laughing at her frustration

"Hey, when you grow your hair this long you can have an opinion" Felicity replied with a cheeky smirk at the man she loved

"The better part of 5 years on a deserted Island Felicity, my hair was a lot longer than yours and I managed with it" Oliver laughed in reply "It looks amazing, lets go" He finished grabbing her by the hand and guiding her out of the room and into the lounge room wear Donna stood waiting

"Ready?" Oliver asked as they entered the room

"Ready" Donna replied happily

Oliver looked out of the window of the limo taking them to the party venue. Fear swirled around his head, he allowed himself to imagine every possible response she could have, from the best possible, a hug and excited "yes", to the worst, a laugh and an "Are you crazy of course not". He was almost certain she would say yes, but he allowed the fear to over take him until he was left shaking slightly.

"You ok Hun?" Felicity said interrupting Oliver's self induced inner emotional breakdown.

"Hmmm, yeah all good, just nervous" He replied with a fake smile, but allowed some of the fear to dissipate with the sound of her voice.

Still playing with her hair, felicity began to wonder what was up with her boyfriend. "Its just a speech" she thought, "I don't understand the stress, he's done hundreds of them. Something is definitely up with him" She continued thinking before her thoughts were interrupted.

"You need to come with me" Thea said excitedly, grabbing her by the hand and walking with her across the room closer to the podium where Oliver would do his speech.

"Hmm why?" Felicity replied shocked and still confused by Oliver's actions and now his sisters as well

"Because we need to be close, to show support obviously" Thea replied, noticing more and more how bad a liar she was "just come" she laughed.

Felicity new something was up, she knew Oliver was not in his right mind, and now neither was Thea. With the fear of secrets and lies in her head she tried her best to push it all aside when her boyfriends name was called out over the speaker.

Oliver's fear still mirrored that of his girlfriend, he swallowed it all and with all the strength he had left stepped up to the podium.

"Star City, thank you for coming out tonight. I am here to tell you all that there is an organization known to us as Hive, now while Hive may be anonymous, their leader is not. Their leader, a man known to us as Damian Dhark has a goal, an evil goal to let this city die. Now we have to be united, the only way to stop this is united as a community. If we come together, if we don't give up faith in our city then it will never truly die and the villains will not win. That's all I really want to say on the topic for now, tonight is a night to be with family, friends and loved ones and to be happy and at peace. So I say to every one here, from myself and my political party Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah, and may you all have an incredible holiday season" Oliver finished his speech with a nod to the crowd and a look towards his own friends and family

Felicity smiled back at him, all fear disappearing from both ends, it was replaced with only love and pride.

"Now if you all don't mind there is one last thing I must say" Oliver began with a smile toward felicity who was now looking very confused "Felicity, can you come up here please" He continued

Felicity began to walk up to the podium, shocked and confused at what was happening she took her place beside her boyfriend.

"So, for those of you who don't know this is Felicity Smoak, they say that behind every great man there is an even greater woman… this is my great woman. The love of my life and my light in the darkness" Oliver began

"Hun what are you doing" Felicity whispered nervously

"She is the only reason I am here today and I can tell you all right here and now that I love her more than anyone in this world. So for a million different reasons, there is something I need to do, in front of the world" He continued bending down on one knee with her hand in his and pulling a ring out of his pocket "Felicity Smoak, please do me the honor of being my wife. Will you marry me?" He finished looking up and smiling at her

"Oliver…. Yes" She answered, it was all she could get out through the tears now pouring down her face but it said so much, it was a vow to spend the rest of her life with this man and she could not be happier.


End file.
